No One to Love Me
by Runawaybaby555
Summary: When Caleb breaks up with Hanna, she begins to doubt herself; doubt herself to the point that she starts to return to her old ways. Can Caleb save her? Based on Haleb breakup in 3x04. Two-shot. Rated T for mention of eating disorders, so don't read if it could trigger something.
1. Chapter 1

**Hey guys! So this idea has been in my head for a while, but I didn't know how to execute it. Now I found a way! This is going to be a two-shot, so lemme know what you think about it!**

**Also, warning: this story highlights on some serious topics. Including bulimia. So be careful when reading, or don't read if it might trigger anything. Now that that's out of the way, enjoy the story! Second chapter should be up later tonight. Oh, and don't forget to review/follow/favorite/WHATEVER to lemme know you like it!**

* * *

Hanna's body shook with sobs as she buried her head in Aria's lap. Aria stroked her back and whispered soothing words to her, guilt encompassing her mind. She couldn't help but feel like this was her fault; after all, SHE was the one who told Hanna she should come clean to Caleb. If it weren't for her, Hanna wouldn't have called Caleb asking to talk to him about it, and A wouldn't have run his mom off the road.

Hanna didn't blame Aria, though. This had slowly been building up for a long, long time, and the big pile of secrets and lies would eventually come tumbling down, Hanna knew it. She just wished she were ready for it.

Caleb was gone. He was gone when she needed him most. She needed him to comfort her, to protect her. She just needed him to look at her with his caring brown eyes one last time and tell her everything was okay, even though she knew it wasn't.

She would do anything for him to be here right now. She would do anything to hear his deep, light-hearted laugh, to hear one of his witty wisecracks, to just hear him say her name, Hanna, in the loving way he always did.

Hanna finally sat up from Aria's lap and wiped her eyes dry. Aria looked at her, concern swimming in her profound hazel eyes. "Is there anything I can do, Han?"

Hanna slowly shook her head. "No," she sniffled. "Thank you for being here, though. It's what I needed."

"Of course," Aria said as she took Hanna's hands in hers. As she looked down at Hanna's hands, which felt warm from working herself up so much, she knew that she needed to do something. Caleb had already broken Hanna's heart once before, and she didn't think it was right for him to do the same thing again.

She needed to talk to him, but not let Hanna know about it.

But whatever she planned on saying to him, it could wait until morning. Right now, Hanna needed her.

Hanna felt her eyes fill to the brim with fresh tears, and she removed her hands from Aria's as she hid her face in them. "I miss him," she choked out, beginning to cry again, and Aria wrapped her arms back around Hanna, doing whatever she could to comfort her broken friend.

* * *

The next morning, Hanna sleepily opened her eyes to find that she was lying on her still-made bed; in her same mint green tank top that she had worn all of yesterday. She looked up to see Aria walk into the room, in a pair of sweats that Hanna told her she could borrow the previous night.

"Hey," she said softly as she walked over to the bed. She sat down and surveyed Hanna carefully. "How are you? Did you sleep okay?"

"I guess," Hanna muttered. She had slept okay, but she still felt emotionally exhausted from the events of the night before.

Aria nodded her head at this, but she still wasn't completely convinced. "That's good," she said warily, and then she bowed her head slightly. "I'm really sorry, Hanna, but I told my mom already that I'd have breakfast with her this morning…"

"Oh," Hanna said, surprised. "You're leaving so soon?"

"Yeah," Aria said sadly as she stood up from the bed. "But we'll talk later." She leaned over and kissed Hanna on the crown of her head. "Feel better, okay?"

"Okay," Hanna said quietly, offering Aria a weak smile. "Bye."

Aria ruffled Hanna's hair sweetly before exiting the room. Hanna paid close attention as Aria left. Aria was so beautiful, and she always had been, with her round, soft eyes, her fair skin, and her raven hair and eyebrows. She had the kind of exotic beauty that turned heads whenever she walked into a room. Even without makeup, she was flawless. But most importantly, she was skinny. Hanna looked down at her stomach, and noticed it protruding outward. Had she gained weight?

_I guess it's a good thing Caleb broke up with me_, Hanna thought grimly. _I'm not good enough for him. I'm not PRETTY enough for him._

She would never be as skinny as Aria, or any of her other friends. She would never be as _pretty_ as them, either, or get the hot, incredible boyfriends, or in Emily's case, girlfriends, that they got. She was simply fat and hopeless.

_Why are my friends even FRIENDS with me in the first place when I'm so ugly_? Hanna thought gloomily. A part of her knew that her friends would never be so judgmental, that it was just her broken heart talking, but the other part wished she could be as pretty as her friends. She hated the fact that she was alone. She wanted to be pretty. She wanted to be skinny.

She wanted Caleb.

Hanna then reached under the bed and felt around for a little bit until she found the one thing that was the escape from her heartbreak, and pulled it up as she examined it.

It was a gallon of Ben & Jerry's ice cream. Rocky Road.

Last night, she had thrown it under the bed as soon as she heard Aria coming up the stairs. She didn't want her to know about this. Aria was the only one of her friends who knew about her… problem, but Hanna didn't want Aria to be concerned about her spiraling back into it.

More importantly, she didn't want Aria to feel sorry for her. If anything, Hanna was just embarrassed by it. Aria got to be her cute, tiny self on a daily basis, while Hanna was stuck being the chubby, pathetic loser that she was in middle school.

She had made herself believe that she had changed since then. That she had finally managed to climb to the top of the totem pole as the prettiest girl in school. That she had surpassed Alison and her cruelty.

But she hadn't. She was still _that girl_. And somewhere above, Alison was just laughing at her.

_It's not like there's any point_, Hanna thought as she opened the tub of ice cream, which was now half empty. _I'm always going to be that girl. Nothing will change._

She reached into the container, grabbed the spoon that she had thrown inside of it last night in panic, and began to shovel the ice cream in her mouth without remorse as salty tears poured out of her eyes and dripped onto the bedspread.


	2. Chapter 2

**So this chapter is SIGNIFICANTLY longer than my first chapter, but I'm pretty proud of how it turned out :) as for you guys who are asking for me to make it longer than a two-shot, unfortunately I won't be doing that :( this story has a resolution that I'm happy with, and I hope you guys will be happy with, so I wanna leave it at that. BUT, good news! I'm working on two other stories at the moment that I probably won't be posting for a while, but they ARE in progress! So keep your eyes peeled for that good stuff, and in the meantime, ENJOY!**

**Oh, and as always, REVIEW REVIEW REVIEW!**

* * *

Caleb sat down at a table outside of The Brew, a coffee in his hand. He had fallen into this routine recently, going to The Brew every morning to have his coffee, usually with Hanna. But unfortunately, the other half of the equation was not with him.

He would give anything to be able to look up to find a hyper, gorgeous, generous blonde sitting across from him, but he knew he couldn't have that. Not after what he had done last night.

_I had to_, he reminded himself. _She was slipping away from me. I'm not what she wants. If I was, she would tell me whatever it is that she's not telling me._

He sipped his coffee mournfully as he stared in front of him, as though if he stared long enough, he would find the beautiful blonde in question sitting across from him.

Unfortunately, it didn't work. But as he _did_ stare, his eyes laid upon a familiar short brunette, in yoga pants and a sweatshirt, angrily stalking toward him.

"Aria?" he said as he stood up from the table, mainly shocked that she was walking around a rich, cushy town like Rosewood in _sweats_, which he had never seen on any girl in this town before, or at least in _public_. She made her way over to him, and before he could say anything else, she punched him in the arm.

"Ow!" he hollered, while admiring her strength; he was _not_ expecting that to come out of her. "What was that for?"

"What do you think?!" she seethed. "How could you _do_ that to her?! Do you realize how upset she is? She loves you, Caleb!"

"And you honestly think that I don't love her back?" he retorted.

"Could've fooled me!" she snapped.

"Aria-"

"Save it," she said, putting her hand up. But with one look at his shocked face, her tone softened. "Sorry. I just needed to get through to you." She then leaned forward secretively and whispered, "Look, I know you love Hanna, and I know that you don't feel good about this."

This disoriented Caleb for a minute. "How did you-"

"Because I'm not stupid," Aria said bluntly. "And honestly, neither is Hanna. She's just blinded by heartbreak, which is why she _doesn't_ see it."

"You're right," he admitted. "But she was keeping something from me. I could feel her distancing herself from me, and I feel like I only exist in part of her life. Hell, it seemed like she was talking more to _Wren_ than she was to me!"

"Is that what this is about?" Aria said, bewildered. "You think she was moving on to _Wren_?"

"I don't know!" Caleb said exasperatedly. "I'm just spewing things out here! All I know is that she doesn't tell me anything anymore. I can't stand the thought of her keeping things from me! If she really loved me, she would tell me whatever is bothering her."

"But what she is hiding is _bigger_ than you, than all of us!"

"She should be able to trust me, though," Caleb croaked out.

"She does," Aria said earnestly, sympathy swimming in her round, mysterious eyes. "She wants to tell you, but it could put you in danger. Hell, it could put _her_ in danger! You have to be patient with her. She needs you more than ever, and you're leaving her in the dust!"

Caleb tried his best to process everything Aria was saying to him, but she was talking so quickly that it was hard for him to keep up.

"Wait, why would it put me in danger if she tells me?" he began, but then it hit him. The last time Hanna was upset about him being in danger, it was because…

"Aria, is A back?" Caleb whispered.

Aria froze, her eyes somehow even bigger and rounder than they were usually. He sighed in frustration at her hesitance. "You can_not_ just drop a bomb like that and then leave me hanging-"

"Will you keep your voice down?" she whispered hastily, and then pulled him to the side, behind a tall, potted plant. "She's going to kill me for telling you-"

"You didn't tell me," Caleb reasoned. "I figured it out."

"Still!" Aria stood on her toes and looked around her, afraid all of a sudden. She then averted her eyes back to Caleb. "Look, you really need to talk to Hanna about this. It could mean you two can be together, but it could also mean the complete opposite. Just… be careful, okay?"

"Okay," he said determinedly. "I'll go over there now."

"Great," she said as she reached over and comfortingly rubbed his arm. "Good luck."

"Thanks," he said as the two parted ways. "I'll need it."

* * *

Hanna stared down at the empty carton of ice cream, somehow feeling even worse than she had before. She touched her face, which felt oily and bloated, and then her stomach, which was protruding even further outward than when she had touched it earlier.

With a sigh, she got up from her bed and walked over to the full-length mirror on the other side of the room, and the worst was confirmed. Her thighs jiggled with every step, her face puffed out like a chipmunk's, and she had curves in all the wrong places.

Muffin top. Love handles. Thunder thighs. They were everywhere.

How had she gotten to this low point?

It didn't matter how. What mattered was that she _had_ gotten to this low point.

And there was only one way to get out of it.

She pried her eyes away from the mirror and made her way over to the bathroom. When she got there, she threw open the door to the cabinet above the sink and fumbled clumsily through everything, her hand shaking, until she found what she was looking for.

In her hand, she had a bright green toothbrush.

Sighing, she kneeled down on the floor, hovered over the toilet, and shoved the toothbrush down her throat.

* * *

Caleb knocked on the door to the Marin house. No answer. He supposed Hanna could be sleeping, but something felt off. He reached up and felt along the top frame of the door until he found the hidden key to let himself in.

"Hanna?" he called, looking around. The place looked empty. Where was she?

Suddenly, his ears perked up to the sound of retching noises. Like someone… throwing up?

His heart stopped, and he immediately lurched forward and raced up the stairwell.

* * *

Hanna spent the next minute emptying the contents of her stomach, continually shoving the toothbrush down her throat, until there was nothing left. She squeezed the toothbrush in her hand as more tears fell, and then just sat there, her body convulsing with sobs.

Suddenly, she felt two strong arms envelope themselves around her, and then pull her back. She leaned into the embrace of the person, not bothering to look up to see who it was, and continued to cry into them.

After a minute, she had calmed down, and had reduced herself from crying to simply breathing heavily. She finally looked up to the person who had come to her rescue, and was met with a familiar pair of kind brown eyes and long brown hair.

Caleb.

"What the hell are you doing?!" he said incredulously, gasping for air. Hanna sat back, not sure of how to respond.

"I didn't think you'd be here," she said feebly.

"Hanna," he began again, "you're not listening to me. _Why are you doing this_?"

"Because you don't love me anymore," she whimpered. "No one wants me. I'm just an ugly, fat loser."

"What?!" he said, shocked. He leaned over and grabbed a few squares of toilet paper, then wiped her mouth and face clean. He then took her face gently in his hands. "Hanna, you are nothing less than beautiful. That's not at _all_ the reason I broke up with you. I just got tired of all of the secrets and lies, but I'm ready now. I'm ready to deal with them again."

"Caleb, no you're not," she said softly, a tear strolling down her cheek.

"Yes I am," he said determinedly, and then lowered his voice. "Hanna, I know that A is back."

"What?" she whispered, shocked. "Who told you?!"

"No one," he said honestly. "I figured it out, okay? We don't have to be apart anymore. We can be together, and I can stop whoever is trying to hurt you!"

"Caleb slow down," Hanna said. "It doesn't work like that. This A… this A means business!"

"Whatever it is, I can take it," he stated.

"No you can't," she argued. "This A…"

"What Hanna?" he shouted. "Dammit, stop _keeping_ things from me!"

"Fine," she deadpanned. "Caleb, A ran your mom off the road."

Caleb's blood ran cold. _A_ had done that? "What..?"

"I got a text last night," Hanna admitted. "I can't have something like that happen to you. I wanted _so much_ to be able to tell you, but I also want _so much_ to be able to be with you. But I can't have both, and... I'd rather be with you."

"But you weren't even _with_ me," Caleb said exasperatedly. "You were someone completely different when you were hiding all of this from me."

"Would you rather have someone completely different or not have me at all?" Hanna challenged.

"It's not like that matters now," Caleb sighed. "The past is the past. I know everything now. And we can be together!"

"You're right, I think we can," Hanna said with a weak smile. "But Caleb, you can't tell anyone about this, and you _have_ to play it off like you don't know. There's a risk to all of this-"

"That's a risk that I'm willing to take," Caleb said compassionately as he took Hanna's hands in his. "I thought I was making the right decision last night, but… if us being apart leads to you going to drastic measures to hurt yourself and thinking that there is even the slightest possibility that I don't love you, then it's clear that we need to stick together through this. I just want you to be happy, Hanna."

Hanna sighed as she looked up to him. "I'm only happy when I'm with you."

He took this as a cue to kiss her gently on her forehead, avoiding her lips because of what she had just done, and then pull her close. She leaned into his embrace, feeling completely at home in his arms.

After he pulled away, he looked over her shoulder at the toilet, then back at her. "_Never_ again, do you hear me?" he scolded. "_Never_."

"Caleb-"

"Stop," he said sternly. "Hanna Marin, you are the most beautiful girl I have ever seen, and you are far from fat. I don't ever want you to feel that way about yourself."

"Why not?" she questioned.

He looked at her knowingly. "Because it breaks my heart to see someone so perfect thinking anything less of herself."

Hearing these words escape his mouth, Hanna finally was able to lean forward and embrace Caleb in another warm, meaningful hug. She felt more tears escape from her eyes, but recognized them as happy tears.

A was still after her, and Caleb was now added into the equation, but she knew that things would turn out all right in the end.

All that mattered now was that she had her Caleb, and they could be there for each other and protect each other in a way they couldn't when he was kept in the dark.

"I love you," she said softly, her eyes closed and her head still resting on his shoulder. He pulled back from her hug and gently pushed a hair away from her face, revealing her light blue eyes that sparkled with love and kindness.

"I love you, too," he answered sweetly. With that, he stood up from the ground and pulled her up with him. "So, what now?"

She sniffled before cracking a mischievous grin. "Well, I know that there is some dong po in the fridge that needs to be cooked."

He returned a smile. "Shall we?" he said eloquently as he held out his hand, and Hanna reached out and grabbed it.

"We shall."

And with that, they went down the stairs together, hand in hand, picking up right where they left off.


End file.
